


A Tale of Burrs

by Phok



Category: D.Gray-man
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-20
Updated: 2021-02-20
Packaged: 2021-03-16 16:35:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,308
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29578965
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Phok/pseuds/Phok
Summary: After a fight gone wrong, Allen helps Kanda pull particles from his hair, and Kanda realizes the depths of his feelings.
Relationships: Kanda Yuu/Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu/Alma Karma, Lavi/Lenalee Lee, mentioned
Comments: 2
Kudos: 42





	A Tale of Burrs

**Author's Note:**

> This is story is set before the Suman Dark Arc. 
> 
> I haven't written D.Gray-Man fanfic in over a decade so please forgive any mistakes or bad characterizations.

“Komui is a dead man,” Kanda growled tugging at the sticky burrs clinging to his hair in obvious annoyance. 

“You can’t blame my brother Kanda, he didn’t know.” Lenalee quickly defended, trying desperately to calm Kanda’s anger. 

Although, even she had to admit this mission had been a disaster. 

Lenalee and Kanda had been dispatched to a small town in Belgium with an “unnatural and unexplained phenomenon.” They had come hoping to locate innocence, instead, they had found old superstitions and a whole lot of Akuma. While the town held no innocence, it was set in a prime location, and apparently, the Earl had been using it as a would-be base. 

The fight had been brutal, and long. 

Only the timely arrival of Allen and Lavi had granted them victory. 

Now all that was left was the clean-up. 

“Tell me again how you managed to get some many burrs in your hair?” Lavi said from his spot resting against the stem of his hammer. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen that many before.” 

Kanda felt pissed, but he held his tongue. For once. He was too tired to argue with idiots. 

“We were thrown into a bushel of them,” Lenalee explained, combing through her own long green locks. She was notably having issues clearing the strands, the burrs were malicious. 

Technically Lenalee had been thrown into Kanda, and then, they flew into the bushes, but that wasn’t important to the story and Kanda wasn’t going to blame Lenalee in front of her crush. It was obvious she had feelings for the stupid rabbit. 

Surprisingly he was feeling charitable today, regardless of his hair woes. 

Kanda worked on the plants for a couple of moments before he finally released the strands of his hair in frustration. “This entire mission has been nothing but a waste of time.”

Allen scoffed. “We killed how many Akuma? All of those souls have been saved. That’s not a waste of time.” His eyes followed the line of Kanda’s fingers, and his own twitched at his side. 

“Tch,” Kanda muttered. He was quickly growing more and more frustrated, and he considered cutting his hair to save himself the trouble. 

“I admit, they are a pain.” Lenalee agreed, tugging at her hair. “Do you think you could give a hand?” She asked as she turned to Lavi. “I don’t think I can get them all on my own.” She tossed her long hair over her shoulder and blinked her eyes widely at him. 

Lavi jumped at the chance. “Sure Lenalee!” He said happily. 

Kanda glanced at Allen and then scowled, there was no way he was asking Short Stack for help. Even if he was tempted. His pride wouldn’t allow it. 

“I could help you,” Allen suggested as if his strange eye could also read Kanda’s thoughts. Or maybe Kanda was getting lax with his facial expressions. 

He almost bit out a sharp decline but halted. He did have a lot of particles, and he was making little progress. Kanda glanced at Lavi and Lenalee, then back to Allen. 

What could it hurt? 

Besides his pride. 

“Tch.” He said shifting his stance slightly “Can you even reach bean sprout?” He taunted. 

Allen scoffed in response. “The names’ Allen.” 

Kanda gushed his teeth in annoyance. 

“Just turn around.” Allen gritted out, his tone bordering on anger. Kanda always brought out the worst in him. 

Kanda surprised himself by complying, he loathed the idea of Allen touching his hair, but mostly because deep deep deep down he really wanted to feel those slender fingers glide through his locks. Not that he would ever willingly admit it. 

“Wow, these are terribly tangled,” Allen commented, tugging at a single burr softly. “I think we should head to the inn, we can probably get these out better in our rooms.” 

Kanda opened his mouth to decline, but Lenalee beat him to it. 

“That’s a great idea, Allen, I would love to sit down. We’ve been fighting for hours now.” She complained looking down at the dark boots on her feet. 

Kanda followed her gaze, his eyes softening slightly. He knew how much Lenalee hated her innocence. 

“Tch. Fine.” Kanda relented, he hated how easily he gave in to Lenalee. Worse she knew he was soft on her, and she exploited it often. 

“We should probably leave in the morning. Kanda and I have different rooms, but you guys can bunk with him.” She said sending Kanda a deep glare so he knew better than to argue. 

“Like hell,” He did anyways. “I’m not rooming with the stupid rabbit and bean sprout!” 

“They didn’t have any other rooms Kanda, and I’m too tired to leave tonight,” Lenalee said as she tapped her toe in annoyance. 

Kanda gritted his teeth in frustration one more time. Oh, he really wished he had the resolve to stand up to her. It was just… every time he went to say something rude he remembered how small and scared she looked when she would hide in his bedroom. Lenalee hated innocence almost as much as he did. 

“Fine.” 

Lenalee’s answering beam was almost worth it. Almost. 

\---

“Your hair is really beautiful Kanda,” Allen said as his fingers worked the sticky plants free. So far the white-haired exorcist had only been able to remove a small handful, and there was plenty more where those came from. 

Kanda said nothing, his eyes slipped closed and he was fighting to hide his enjoyment. He could feel those sinful fingers as they caressed the back of his neck, and tangled in his dark hair. 

“I have to admit I’ve always been curious. Even in Martel. Your hair always looked so silky.” Allen continued, seemingly unbothered by Kanda’s silence. “I’ll tell you a secret if you promise not to tell Lenalee I said it?” Allen prompted as he worked on a pretty vicious knot. 

“Hn. What is it?” Kanda asked, his mood lighter than usual, so he humored Allen.

“I think your hair is even more pretty than hers.”

Kanda felt his face flush. “Don’t be stupid.” 

“I’m not. I really do think it’s prettier. I wanted to tell Komui that, when he told me Lenalee had the prettiest hair in the world, but I know he has a sister complex so I didn’t bother.” 

“Tch.” Kanda snorted, “It wouldn’t be worth the tantrum.” 

“You can say that again.” Allen chuckled. 

Kanda sighed and winced as the knot was finally pulled free. His head felt tender, but compared to the other pain in his body it was nothing to get worked up over. 

“Oops. Sorry.” Allen said with a gentle voice. “I promise I’m trying to be careful. I know you’re probably annoyed with me touching you, but I bet you’d still be trying to get two of these out on your own.” 

“As annoying as you are, you have a point.”

Allen laughed, the sound was light and soft, like wind chimes. 

“Thank you, Kanda, for letting me help you. I know you could have asked one of the others for assistance.” 

Kanda turned his head as if to make eye contact with Allen, but he stopped when he felt the tension of his hair being pulled. 

He swallowed thickly and forced the rush of emotions from his face. It was hard to completely mask his feelings, but he was pretty good at it. 

“What a stupid thing to say.” He snapped, but the bite was lost. 

Allen hummed. “After this, I can brush it for you.” 

Kanda remained silent for a couple of seconds, “I’ll need to take a shower first.” He relented. Great, now he was losing his edge, even with Allen. 

“I don’t mind waiting,” Allen told him helpfully. “We’ll have plenty of time, Lenalee has even more hair than you do. I still can’t believe how tangled up yours has gotten, and Lenalee’s looked worse. I guess despite its beauty, long hair can be a pain.” 

Kanda closed his eyes and nodded slowly. “It can be a pain.” He admitted.

“Can I ask why you grew it long?” Allen pulled another burr-free and smiled. He almost wished Kanda would let him wash his hair for him, but he knew that would never happen. Kanda would sooner slice his face off. 

A brief image of a young boy flashed before Kanda’s eyes. His smile was wide and disarming. Alma. Karma. 

‘I love your hair Yuu, I can’t wait to see it when it is grown.’ 

Kanda swallowed thickly. “I -” he paused. 

“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to,” Allen said quickly. 

“A friend, he liked my hair.” Kanda finally admitted. The pain of Alma Karma tugging at his chest. 

“Liked?” Allen said, his fingers stilled in Kanda’s hair, and the thick locks slide through his hands like water. 

“He’s dead now.” Kanda found himself saying, the gulf-sized ball catching in his throat. It hurt, even thinking the name hurt. Someday it wouldn’t… maybe. But Kanda wasn’t lucky enough for that to be today. Thinking of Alma made his heart shuddered and he wanted to shove Allen away, caring for someone made people weak, and Kanda wasn’t weak. 

“I’m sorry,” Allen said as he resumed the task. He pulled another piece free, then twisted a strand of hair in his fingers and rubbed the soft locks. They really were so smooth and fine, it was like touching silk. 

Kanda closed his eyes and held his breath, if he focused hard enough he wouldn’t allow the grief to display over his face. 

They worked in silence after that, each moment pulling Kanda further away from the spiral. 

Finally, Allen’s fingers combed through Kanda’s hair without meeting resistance. “All done.” He said cheerfully. 

Kanda blinked into the moment, his mind having drifted farther away. He turned in his chair to face Allen, as he moved a couple of strands tumbled over his shoulder like a curtain. He reached up and slid his own fingers through his hair, he was happy it was no longer matted. Even if his face did nothing to show his feelings. 

“Did you know you have really expressive eyes,” Allen said smiling. 

Kanda glared instantly. “What is your point?” 

Allen only grinned wider. “I just thought you should know, your face says mad, but your eyes scream happy.” 

And then Allen did the worst thing in the world, he poked Kanda in the cheek lightly. 

Kanda’s eyes flashed. 

“Oh! There’s rage.” Allen remarked, still smiling. 

Stupid fucking beansprout!

“You’re an idiot!” He snapped standing abruptly and heading to the bathroom he needed a shower and a change of clothes. 

Most of all, he needed to put space between him and Allen Walker. 

\---

The hot water scolded over his skin and Kanda was momentarily distracted from his external pain. The emotional pain, not so much. He should have known better. Talking about Alma made his entire being ring with hollow agony.

At the time he was too young to realize the depths of his feelings, but there was something so inescapable about Alma. 

Allen too.

The Bookman liked to say history repeated itself, and now Kanda was left wondering if that was true. Fearing it might be. 

His only solace was the stark difference between Allen and Alma. Allen was less joyful, more weighted. His existence brimmed with pain and he wore his curse, like armor to protect him. Whereas Alma was the sun. His light shone over Kanda’s shadows. 

Their only likeness was Kanda’s feelings and their shared kindness. 

Something Kanda sorely lacked. Even more, in the wake of Alma’s death. Kanda couldn’t afford to be attached to people, emotions cloud judgment, and innocence ruined everything. There was no end to the Holy War in sight… 

His suffering was like an endless loop that wouldn’t end, and now he was starting the loop again. Only this time with Allen. 

If he was smart - he’d end it now. 

But there was a part of him, that longed to know what it would feel like to embrace it. 

Would it be, could it… 

He swallowed thickly. He didn’t deserve happiness. And Allen didn’t deserve to deal with Kanda. It was better to push everyone away. The more you have, the more you have to lose. 

It was cliche but true. 

He turned the hot water off and got out of the shower slowly, the steam had covered the windows in a thick layer of haze, and he wiped the mirror to see his reflection. Allen was right, his eyes held all of his emotion, and it was clear that he was feeling vulnerable. As much as he hated to admit it. 

He stood there naked for several seconds before he made up his mind. He was going out there to tell Allen off, and then put some distance between them. He never wanted to feel like he had with Alma again. 

Decision made, he quickly dried off and dressed. He brushed his hair over his shoulders and toweled it off carefully. Despite the maintenance, it was still dripping when he exited the bathroom. He shut the door carefully and turned towards Allen, the cutting retort already crawling up his throat. The words were forming in his head, and spider-like tendrils were grasping at words like incompetent, idiotic, and witless 

He hardened his eyes, stealing his expression to withstand Allen’s knowing gaze. 

“That took you a while, I hope you are feeling better,” Allen greeted him, effectively cutting off the stream of words. 

Kanda blanched in uncertainty. His resolve crumbled like a level one Akuma. 

“I made you a spot in front of the bed.” Allen continued, gesturing towards the pillow on the floor. “I figured it would be best if you were sitting since you’re a little taller than me.” 

Kanda fought the urge to scoff. He wasn’t one to back away from a challenge, so he brought the words to the center of his mind again. 

“Oh no, your hair is dripping,” Allen cut in again. He hurried his steps to the cabinet where the towels were located. He quickly pulled out the largest, fluffiest-looking one. “Don’t worry I’ve got it.”

Kanda had a single moment to shove Allen away, but it passed before he could even contemplate the best way to do that. Instead, Allen grabbed his wrist and pulled him towards the bed, he took a seat and pulled Kanda into a sitting position. 

He went willingly, still trying to process how he failed so horribly. It was a simple plan, with 3 easy steps. Walkout, piss Allen off, walk off. How had he failed it so badly?

“You really should learn to dry your hair better, you got water all over the floor.” Allen chided easily.

“Tch. Shut up.” Kanda grunted, instead of saying anything truly terrible as he intended. 

He felt Allen capture his hair in the towel, and then he began to twist his hair slowly. The towel was wet on his back, but he could feel the rest of the water draining out of his hair. The towel touched the top of his head, and then Allen pulled it down the length of his mane. Slowly he dried his locks, not completely, but enough that water no longer cascaded down his spine. 

“There! Now I can brush it out.” 

Kanda sighed.

“Don’t be like that Kanda, it won't take long for me to brush your hair, and I promise not to brand it as Lavi did.” Allen finished his sentence by separating Kanda’s hair into 3 different sections. “When I said brush, I actually meant comb. I think combing is better for hair, and you’ll want to keep yours healthy.” 

“It doesn’t matter.” 

“Sure it does, your hair is too pretty to be damaged.” 

“Tch.”

“You can act grouchy all you want, I know you take good care of it. Otherwise, it wouldn't be so soft.” 

“Stop blathering on and on,” Kanda grunted, but he was having difficulties remaining his antisocial, grumpy self. 

“Just relax, I’ll take care of you,” Allen assured him, completely disregarding his piss poor attitude. 

“I don’t need anyone to take care of me.” 

“Of course not, but that doesn't mean we don’t want to.” 

Kanda licked his lips slowly, thinking over the words. Alma. Marie. Daisya. Tiedoll. Lenalee. Komui. Lavi. All people he cared for, and maybe at one time they cared for him too. 

And of course, there was Allen. 

“I know you don’t like asking for help,” Allen continued, “But I’m always willing to give it to you.” 

The comb steadily made its way through his hair, droplets of water sliding down the heel and dripping down Allen’s arm. Kanda could tell because the water was leaking onto the back of his neck. 

He wanted to say something, but his mouth felt glued closed. He had many things to say, but he couldn’t bring them to fruition. 

The comb continued its path, and Kanda felt at ease. He wouldn’t admit it, but he knew he was relaxing against Allen’s legs. His back was pressing harder and hard into his shins, and his hair spilled over his lap. He could feel the way Allen’s knees shifted as he maneuvered each section through the comb. Like this, he almost felt at peace. 

Strangely time passed in a bubble. Almost as if Miranda and her time clock were near. 

“Are you falling asleep on me?” Allen teased. “That’s alright, I’m almost done, and then you can rest for real.” 

Kanda hummed in agreement, his sleepy state making him much more agreeable. After a couple more moments, Allen finally released his hair. “All done, Yuu.” 

Kanda’s eyes snapped open, his heart hammering in his chest. He was sure Lavi’s hammer was less noticeable at the moment. 

“Don’t call me that.” He snapped.  
“Sorry,” Allen laughed, his breath caught and he shoved his fingers in Kanda’s hair one more time. “I love how soft it is.” 

Kanda flushed. He hid it well, hopefully. 

“I don’t care what you think,” he lied. 

He stood up and tugged his hair forward over his shoulder. “Do you have my hair string?” He took a step forward and turned towards Allen. 

Allen blinked at him, staring into his dark molten eyes. 

“I don’t,” He said, standing up and closing the distance between them, “but you should leave it down.” 

Kanda didn’t back down, and his heart didn’t stop pounding. 

“I like it like this,” Allen said, his fingers wrapping around the loose strand of hair and sliding it up slowly. He cupped Kanda’s cheek and leaned on to the balls of his feet. He kept balance and closed the gap between them. 

Kanda’s breath caught, his chest seized, and an array of lotus burst before his eyes. He had a moment to decide, but he didn’t give himself the chance, instead, he leaned into the kiss. His lips brushing over Allen’s with firm pressure. Allen’s lips were soft and smooth. 

Instead of shoving Allen off of him, he pulled him closer and deepened the kiss. His lips moving against Allen’s in an open-mouthed kiss. 

“Fuck, Kanda.” The normally polite exorcist gasp, pulling away for a moment to gather his breath. His gaze met Kanda’s and his eyes shined like the moon.

Kanda released a small smile. Something was blooming between them. Something stronger than he wanted to fight. Allen was the moon, and Kanda the stars, both were fighting to be visible in the darkness. Maybe together they could glow like sapphires. 

“Kiss me again?” Allen pleaded. 

Kanda was helpless to resist, or maybe he didn’t want to. Maybe he found something worth suffering for after all. 

“Whatever you want, short stack.” Kanda taunted and sealed their lips together one more time. 

Maybe this was what salvation felt like.


End file.
